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| Date | 21-02-07 |
| Message | A wind up ......bite....get it ....stupid !  now get back to work. |
| Date | 21-02-07 |
| Message | if u dont bite on a twat cake what do u do with them /stupid  |
| Date | 21-02-07 |
| Message | Roy, you sure bit on them twatcakes !   |
| Date | 20-02-07 |
| Message | i would love to make your twat cakes but it looks like you had your fair share 4 one and 2 as if i can c the top of the cooker 2 cook |
| Date | 20-02-07 |
| Message | A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him." So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy" You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice. So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and said "Who's speaking please?" And a voice said "You are." So I rang up a local building firm, I said "I wanna skip outside my house." He said "I'm not stopping you." "Doc, I can't stop singing "The green green grass of home"." "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" "It's not unusual." "Doctor, I can't pronounce my F's, T's and H's." "Well you can't say fairer than that then" |
| Date | 20-02-07 |
| Message | ** ADVERTISEMENT ** Disney have decided to remake Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs affectionately renamed "Doug White and the Half Moon A Borrowers" (that's not a reference to Daryll borrowing money all the f*cking time by the way). No equity card needed just shit for brains and a desire to be famous for anything other than darts. As a treat to all succesful applicants, the real Half Moon A team will be flown to the studios so you can take the piss out of them whilst not required on shot. |
| Date | 20-02-07 |
| Location |  |
| Message | UNLOVED ? FEELING PICKED ON ? PEOPLE ALWAYS HAVING A GO AT YOU ? USELESS AND SMELLY. ? HAVING SE*X*UAL THOUGHTS ABOUT POULTRY.? WISHING YOUR LEGS WERE LONGER OR THAT YOU HAD HAIR.? NOW'S THE TIME TO LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND ASK YOURSELF  WHY DO I PLAY FOR THE HALF MOON A TEAM.??????? |
| Date | 20-02-07 |
| Location |  |
| Message | PICKING UP ON THE COMMENTS FROM MY FELLOW X TEAM SUPERSTAR TUBBY HERES A THOUGHT FOR SNOW WHITE AND THE 8 DWARFS. SNOW WHITE - DOUG DOPEY - DARYLL SLEEPY - DTD BASHFULL - ROB. GRUMPY - FUTURE. SNEEZY - STEVE K DOC - SPARKY. HAPPY - PETE. SCUFFER - AS HIMSELF |
| Date | 20-02-07 |
| Location |  |
| Message | NICE TO SEE DFM HAS RE-APPEARED ON THE SCENE OUT OF THE ANUS OF ONE OF OUR FEATHERED FRIENDS,HOW A MAN WHO COMB'S HIS HAIR WITH A SPONGE CAN HAVE A POP AT ME I DO NOT KNOW. WHILST I WAS ON MY SCOUTING MISSION FOR NEW PLAYERS FOR THE A TEAM AT EURO DISNEY (EVEN THEY DIDNT HAVE THAT MANY MICKY MOUSE PLAYERS)IT APPEARS THE MAN WHO SENT ME, THE FUTURE HAS HIT THE BOTTLE.FROM WHAT I AM HEARING HE CANT EVEN DO THAT WELL.ALTHOUGH AT LEAST HE HAS SEEN THE LIGHT HE REALISES THE ONLY WAY HE WILL BE ABLE TO PLAY FOR THE MIGHTY X TEAM IS TO BE ABLE TO KEEP UP WITH OUR DRINKING.  |
| Date | 20-02-07 |
| Location |  |
| Message | So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you give me a lift?' I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.' |
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